Pia caught a cold from Sammy, who caught it from Dominic, who brought it home from school.
The runny nose bothers Pia, so Mommy told her to drink lots of water so she'll get better.
So she pours water in her tumbler and drank. After drinking:
Pia: Mommy, I already drank lots of water
Mommy: Good.
Pia: But why does my cold still not go away?
* * *
The children weren't accustomed to having their own bedroom when we first moved in to our apartment. They'd ask Mommy to stay with them and read stories to them until they fell asleep. They also want the bedroom door kept open.
Dominic was especially problematic. For the first few months, it was especially bad when he had to get up at the middle of the night to pee. He's scared of getting out of bed in the dark.
First he'd moan. Then he'd groan. Until his moaning and groaning turned so loud that his Daddy or Mommy had to get up and lead him to the toilet.
After months we've had enough and we decided he has to learn to go by himself. So we made up our minds to ignore his midnight howling.
So he'd moan long and hard. Then he'd groan. Then he'd howl like a wolf cub. That'd go on for about 10 minutes. Until finally, when he can no longer hold it in, he'll rush down his bunk bed, run into the toilet, relieve himself, switch the toilet light off, then run as fast as he can back to bed before any 'ghosts' can catch him. All that time he'd be grunting and growling, incensed at his inconsiderate parents who unknown to him, are giggling in the dark.
* * *
We went to the zoo. While watching the snow leopard, Pia started dancing and making funny faces at the leopard:
Pia: (singing loudly) Hello Mr. Leopard, you cannot eat me, nyah-nyah-nyanyanyah. You cannot eat me, wa wa wawawa.
Daddy: (teasing, and pointing to a spot among the plants behind Pia). Pia, the leopard can get out of the cage through here. It's open.
Pia: (sudden flash of white fear, softly) O.....K....I....won't....sing...it...anymore.
* * *
Prior to coming to Australia, we read that the Aussies are crazy about their sports. After a few months living here, it has become clear that not only was that statement true, but also that 'crazy' was a carefully chosen adjective.
Among their sports, it seems Footy is one of the kings.
Footy is their football, a game which has little resemblance to soccer. To this untrained eye, it looks like American football on planet Mad Max (we don't use helmets and shoulder guards -- they tend to splinter and crack open during play)
Walking around the neighbourhood one day we came upon three boys, aged 8, 5, and 2 playing with a footy 'ball'. The 2 year old looked like he just learned to walk this morning, and was already raring to play footy with a ball half his size.
"Dominic!" yelled out the 8-year old.
Daddy: (surprised, to Dominic) Do you know him?
Dominic: No.
Daddy: How come he knows your name?
Dominic: He's in my school.
Boy: Dominic, what's your footy team?
It's just taken for granted that everyone, including 6 year olds, has a footy team.
* * *
After the children finish their daily assignments (usually math equations), we go through their answers, marking each with an X or a check. Pia goes ballistic each time an X is made in any of her answers, as she gets teased by her elder brother and is thus under pressure to always get her answers right. (Not that Dominic always get his answers right the first time)
One day, Pia finishes her assignment and submits it to Mommy:
Mommy: (checking each answer). This is right...this is right... this is wrong...
Pia: (Groan). Mommy! NO MISTAKES ALLOWED!
* * *
At Mass, during collection. Pia has the coins in her hand, and is waiting for the collector to pass by. Pia recalls previous admonitions to drop her donation discreetly.
In hushed, almost conspiratorial tones:
Pia: I will not show them what I put in the bag.
Daddy: Good, that's how to do it.
Pia: Why must I not show people what I put in?
Daddy: Because that's how it's done.
Pia: What will the people do if they see what I put in?
* * *
Dominic had just come home from school and still in his uniform, positioned himself in front of the TV. Showing was some kind of non-famous superhero cartoons.
One at a time, the characters in the show introduced themselves as a superhero: "I am X, master of stone" (something like that)
Mommy: Dominic, change your clothes now!
Dominic starts changing while still in front of the TV. He takes his pants off...
Pia: (pointing to Dominic) And here's the superhero with smelly panty!
* * *
Dominic likes to explain how things work. Which is fine, except that he tends to teach you things you already know, so his lectures can be a bit tedious. The telltale sign of a new lecture is his opening remark, "Look...'
One hectic day, Dominic approaches Daddy...
Dominic: Daddy, look...
Daddy: (groan, here's another lecture) I'm busy right now...
Dominic: (picks up the optical mouse and points to the red light underneath, where the ball is on older models) Look at this red light.
Daddy: (sigh) Yes, what about it?
Dominic: Look, if I point it at my hand, you can see the red light.
Daddy: (Duh) Yes, it's called reflection.
Dominic: But when I point it to here (the computer's LCD screen), you can't see the red light.
Daddy: (Astonished) You're right. That's pretty amazing.
And it was amazingly. And the reluctant student spent several minutes more playing with the mouse's light, impressed at what the professor discovered. Somehow the LCD screen absorbs the red light and doesn't reflect it back.
* * *
Pia likes to walk on the floor with only her socks on. She keeps misplacing her slippers though, and it's driving Mommy crazy.
Time to eat but Pia can't enter the kitchen without slippers:
Mommy: Where's your slippers again?
Pia: I don't know where they are...
Mommy: It's because you don't always wear your slippers, that's why you always lose them. You must always wear your slippers!
Pia: But Mommy...how can we sleep with our slippers on?
* * *
Re-runs of The Simpsons is on TV every day at 6pm. Both Pia and Dominic love the show and watch it as often as they can. But we have dinner at 5:30 so if they don't eat fast enough, they won't be able to watch.
Most of the time they miss much of the show because of their own dawdling at dinner. Pia, especially, can take up to two hours to finish her food.
One day while starting to sit down for dinner Pia comes ups with a plan:
Pia: (shouting, to catch everyone's attention) Here's how not to miss the Simpsons! Step one! Eat your food quickly and do not play while eating.
Daddy: Good. What's step two?
Pia: Step two, watch the Simpsons!
Duh.
* * *
This post rated P21 : 21 years old and above
"I have a clean fok", said Dominic after washing his fork which had fallen off the dining table.
We had been letting his mispronunciations pass, but this sounded too funny. (We even blogged about his missing 'r' almost exactly one year ago: here)
Daddy: It's forrrrrk. Say fork.
Dominic : Fok
Daddy: No, "Fork"
Dominic :Fohk (a hint of r coming out)
Daddy: Forrrrrrk;
Dominic: Fohhhhhhk.
We weally need to pwactice him.
* * *
Mommy's back is painful, and asks Dominic and Pia to help her with Sammy:
Mommy: Dominic, Pia, can you look after Sammy?
Pia: My pleasure, Mommy!
That's a new expression for her, almost certainly picked up from watching TV, and is a welcome contrast to her other replies, like 'I got too much work' or 'No thanks'
* * *
A few weeks ago we introduced Dominic to what 'antonyms', 'synonyms', and 'homonyms' are, and he's fascinated by the concept.
Since then, every time he discovers a new pair of antonyms, or synonyms, or homonyms, he'd walk up to us and say something like, 'Daddy I know a homonym -- three like the number 3, and tree the plant'.
One day:
Dominic: Daddy, what's the opposite of house?
Daddy: (No clue) What?
Dominic: (joking) An upside down house, or an un-house.
* * *
Pia's birthday is coming up, and she's getting both excited and anxious.
Pia: Mommy, will you give me a gift on my birthday?
Mommy: Of course!
Pia: Yoohoo! Praise the mother!
(She's been using that expression quite a bit after watching
The Ant Bully
* * *
Pia: (in a muffled voice, from inside the toilet) Sammy looks like an owl.
Daddy: (in the kitchen, didn't quite hear clearly) What did you say?
Pia: Sammy looks like an owl
Daddy: (to Mommy) ??
Mommy: Like an owl
Daddy: (to Pia) Why is Sammy like an owl?
Pia: (something indistinct) !
Daddy: (going over to Pia) Why is Sammy like an owl?
Pia: Stop it!
Daddy: ??? Why is Sammy like an owl?
Pia: Dahdee...Sammy is not like an owl. He's a baby.
Daddy: But you said he's like an owl
Pia: I didn't say Sammy is like an owl
Daddy: What did you say?
Pia: (pointing to the window, outside of which are birds cawing) I said "That sounds like an owl"
* * *
Dominic wants to play knock knock jokes with Pia. Pia hasn't a clue how the game goes.
Take 1:
Dominic: Pia, knock knock
Pia: (gestures opening the door) Come in
Dominic: No, Pia, you say 'who's there'
Take 2:
Dominic: Knock knock
Pia: I already opened the door
Dominic: No, You should say 'who's there
Take 3:
Dominic: Knock knock
Pia: Who is it?
Dominic: You should say 'who's there'
Pia: Who's there?
Dominic: Atch
Pia: Welcome, come in.
Dominic: No
Take 4:
Dominic: Knock knock
Pia: Who's there?
Dominic: Atch
Pia: What is atch?
Dominic: No, you should say 'Atch who?'
Take 5:
Dominic: Knock knock
Pia: Who's there?
Dominic: Atch
Pia: Who is atch?
Dominic: No! It's 'Atch who'
Take 6:
Dominic: Knock knock
Pia: Who's out there?
Dominic: Atch
Pia: What's that?
Dominic wisely gives up and plays something else.
* * *
An overexcited Dominic was telling an imaginary story. Speaking rapidly, he would collapse now and then, giggling at (one surmises) funny turns in the story. Unfortunately no one could follow what he was saying, and the story is progressing to...nowhere:
Pia: (leaning close to Daddy's ear) Look Daddy, Dominic is being silly.
Daddy: Should we bring him to a doctor?
Pia: Yes
Daddy: Yeah, I think he's gone crazy
Pia: I think he's running out of gas
* * *
Dominic learns about the 'knock knock' routine in school. He tries it out while on the way home:
Dominic: Knock knock!
Daddy: Who's there?
Dominic: Smash
Daddy: Smash who?
Dominic: I will smash you!
(First attempt at knock knocks. A long way to go)
* * *
"Is this the fastest car of ever?", asked Dominic.
He has this peculiar expression: "of ever", which he uses to mean "ever". "This is the biggest house of ever!"
Daddy: You don't need to say "of". Just say "ever"
Dominic: (tries out the new phrasing) The fastest car...ever.
Doesn't like it.
Dominic: (glum) But I like 'of'. Don't tell me I cannot say 'of'.
Daddy: Ok.
* * *
Pia peeps into the kitchen:
Pia: Daddy, can you enjoy me and Sammy?
Daddy: (??) What did you say?
Pia: Can you enjoy me and Sammy?
Daddy: What do you mean 'enjoy'?
Pia: Come play here with us.
Daddy: Oh, the word is 'join'. Come 'join' us.
* * *
"Stop calling me Pia!", screamed Pia. "I don't want you to call me Pia!"
Daddy: Why not?
Pia: I just don't want you to call me Pia.
Daddy: Why not?
Pia: There's no why!
Daddy: (poor attempt at humor) Should we call you....turkey?
Pia: No!
Daddy: Don't you like your name?
Pia: I like...but I don't want you to call my name when you're angry.
It seems we've been calling out her name using a stern voice far too many times. But she doesn't respond until the seventh call, so what can you do?
* * *
Pia has taken to drawing animals. She copies them from a drawing book that teaches how to draw farm animals. She's very motivated and getting quite good.
Showing her latest drawings to Daddy:
Pia: Look Daddy!
Daddy: That's a nice horse. You should draw the legs like this...
Pia: (grabs the drawing) I want to learn by myself. I don't need any teach!
* * *
Pia has a set time for reading every day. Outside that time she is usually at play. Hell hath no fury than Pia bothered at play.
While browsing through Pia's older (and simpler) reading material:
Daddy: Pia, come here and look at your old reading lessons. See how you knew so much fewer words then? Can you still read these?
Pia: (approaches and starts reading ) "May..I..come..
Suddenly she realizes that she's 'reading' during play time!
Pia: Hey! (and runs away)
* * *
Morning rush hour.
Pia was spreading peanut butter on her bread in extreme slow motion. Daddy gets impatient, grabs the butter knife from Pia, quickly spreads butter on his bread, then hands back the knife to Pia:
Daddy: Thank you.
Pia: Daddy, don't say thank you to yourself.
Daddy: I was saying 'thank you' to you.
Pia: But I didn't give you the knife. You took it from me.
* * *
Dominic: I know a homonym: 'cross', which means 'angry', and Cross, where Jesus died.
Daddy: That's right. Where is Jesus now?
Dominic: In heaven.
Daddy: And he can see everything. If you do something bad, he's not happy. If you do something good, he's happy.
Dominic: What if I do something that's half-good and half-bad?
* * *
On the way to school:
Dominic: Is the earth moving fast?
Daddy: Yes...(mental calculation...25,000 miles at the equator in 24 hours)...very fast. We are moving faster than most planes fly.
Dominic: Why don't we fall off?
Daddy: Because we stick to the earth. If you look at the earth from space, people in Australia are standing upside down.
Dominic: (makes a fist and points East) and people here stand like this (horizontal).
Daddy: And people in the North stand upright.
Dominic: People in the North just turn around and around on their feet when the earth spins?
Daddy: I guess. That's how it works. And if you jump, the earth under you will move and you land on a different part of the earth
Dominic: If we jump here, when we land we can be already in school.
Daddy: Or you may smash into a moving building.
Dominic: Or smash into the tram.
Daddy: Don't forget, the earth moves around the sun.
Dominic: So when we jump, when we land, the earth is no longer under us so we fall in outer space.
Daddy: Right. The earth has already moved around the sun.
Dominic: Wow.
* * *
Pia seems to think she's in rehab, or on probation, or something:
One day a lady with a big dog walked past us. Pia looked with interest at the dog:
Pia: Daddy, when I start becoming a good girl, will you find me a dog?
* * *
We discovered that at lunchtime he plays with his best friend in the school's sandbox. The sand mixes with sweat from his feet and turns his socks from cloud white to mud black.
To stop this daily delivery of dirty socks once and for all, Mommy told Dominic that he can no longer play in the sandbox.
One day, coming home from school...
Mommy: "Dominic, did you play in the sandbox today?"
Dominic: No
Mommy: Very good! Where did you play with your best friend?
Dominic: I didn't play with him.
Mommy: Why not?
Dominic: I told him you said I cannot play with him anymore.
* * *
Dominic's normal morning routine upon reaching school is to go to the toilet to wee-wee, wash his hands, then go to his classroom.
One morning as we neared the toilet...
Daddy: (going through the daily motions) Ok, go to pee, then go to your classroom.
Dominic: (stiff as a rock)
Daddy: (louder voice) Go to pee now!
Dominic: (face turning red, groaning) Daaadeee....
Daddy: What's wrong?
Dominic: (boiling red) Don't..tell..me..to..pee.
Daddy: ??
Then looking around, the reason became clear. A pretty little girl was loitering nearby. Our little Romeo who has only just recently graduated from 'wee-wee' to 'pee' is now embarrassed at being told to pee within earshot of pretty girls.
My days as a 'cool' Dad are numbered.
* * *
On the way to the supermarket after church.
Daddy is pushing Sammy's stroller. Pia is at the right and holding on to the stroller, her feet just a couple of inches away from Daddy. Daddy almost stepped on Pia's foot.
Daddy: Watch out! Don't walk too close to me.
Mommy: Pia, come over to this side.
Pia: (will say anything not to obey) I can't...I will break my leg.
* * *
The city-sized behemoth ship Titanic easily slipped into the ocean bottom.
Meanwhile, the vitamin C tablet that Dominic has to swallow just won't go in.
He'd drink glass after glass after glass of water, and the capsule would still manage to float to safety and stay in his mouth. It would melt a little but still manage to hang on.
Finally, after many many tries, he just decided to bite the capsule, chew the tablet (it tastes like very bitter lemon anyhow), and wash his mouth with water.
So that's how it goes every morning. Younger Pia easily swallows exactly the same tablet, while Dominic chews his.
* * *
Lunchtime again. Still Pia's job to set the table for lunch despite her daily attempts to evade it:
Mommy: (in the kitchen) Pia, set the table now.
Pia: (shouting from the bedroom) I can't!
Mommy: Why not?
Pia: I have a lot of work to do!
...and proceeds to play with her toys.
* * *
Term vacation is over. It's back to school again.
During the term break, while thinking of ways to help Dominic with his writing, we hatched a sneaky plan.
We decided that, before the school re-starts, we will practice him on writing about the most likely topic they will write on on the first day of school. It was very easy to guess the topic. No doubt it would be: "What I Did on My Vacation"
So we made him write on that topic one day ahead, and he did very well on the practice writing. We were confident he wouldn't do so badly when the teacher asks them to write about it.
When Dominic came home from school, our first question was:
Daddy: Did the teacher ask you to write?
Dominic: Yes.
Daddy: Did she ask you to write about what you did on your vacation?
Dominic: No.
Daddy: (surprised) Hmm...
Dominic: I wrote about the planets.
Daddy: Oh? Did she say you can write about anything?
Dominic: Yes. She said write about anything...anything we did when there was no school.
* * *
Dominic and Pia are playing in the living room. We want them to play in the bedroom where Sammy is:
Daddy: Dominic! Pia! Come into the bedroom and play here. And keep an eye on Sammy while you play.
Pia turned quiet and appeared to be looking at empty space a foot from the tip of her nose.
Pia: Daddy...how can I watch Sammy with one eye and look at my toys with the other eye?
* * *
"Yes boss," said Mommy, in response to Sammy's insistent crying, a sign that he really wants to go to sleep now.
Pia hadn't heard of the word 'boss' before:
Pia: "What's a boss?"
Mommy: Ask Daddy.
Daddy: (trying to explain) Hmm...for people who work, a boss is someone who tells you what to do, just like for students, your teacher is your boss.
Pia: Someone who tells us what to do?
Daddy: Yes
Pia: They tell you what to do, like: "Finish your food!"
* * *
Domu is bugging Pia by echoing everything she says using a robot intonation. Pia is getting pretty annoyed:
Pia: DADDY! Domu is copying what I say!!!!
Dominic: Daddy..Pia..Is...Copying...What...I...Say.
Pia: STOP IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Dominic: Stop...It.
Pia: You're not a robot!
Dominic: You're...Not...A...Robot.
Pia: You're not a robot! Robots aren't smelly! No robot is smelly!
* * *
The best way to improve your writing is to write, say the experts.
Dominic's grade in writing lags behind his grades in other subjects. According to his teacher this is mostly because he doesn't write much of anything when she asks the students to write. He writes one, two, or three sentences at the most.
We decided to help Dominic improve his skills and confidence by making him write short 'essays' every other day. And we demanded that each essay be at least ten sentences long.
We gave him the freedom to pick his topic, but if he can't think of one we help by suggesting some.
Here's his first essay,unedited (including reference to grandchildren we didn't know we had):
When I swim
When I swimed in the swimming pool. I played in the swimming pool. When I went with my children to the deap water. I, jumped in the deap water. I went up the swimming pool. I did it two more times. then I hanged on the monkey bars. then I went back on the water. where I started swimming. then I went up.
* * *
Pia approaches Mommy...
Pia: (innocently) Mommy, what is 15 minus 8?
Mommy: (too smart to be fooled). Ah-hah! You're trying to get me to do the assignment Daddy gave you. Do your assignment yourself!
Pia: (slinks back to her desk) Ohhhkey...
We give the children 'assignments' everyday, to help Dominic keep up his grades in school and to prepare Pia for school. But Pia is known to try and get help from wherever she can.
* * *
Ever since Sammy started crawling, we have had to keep an eye on him to make sure he doesn't go near baby-unfriendly spots, like near things that can potentially tip over or objects that he might scatter about.
If he approaches such spots, Daddy or Mommy will shout: "Sammy, no!", and shake our head. He will normally stop, listen, and then continue on, requiring us to pick him up and re-orient him to another direction.
One day we observed him crawling to one of the forbidden spots. Suddenly he stopped, shook his head left and right, as if reminding himself this is a no-go zone, and then change course.
* * *
When we had our daughter, we may have had visions of her being a fine little girl who likes pretty clothes and behaves with princess-like poise. Like what the children's poem says about little girls -- sugar and spice and everything nice.
At the dinner table we spy her spooning pumpkin soup into her mouth, then looking up at the ceiling while noisily gurgling each mouthful of the soup.
Where did our princess go?
* * *
Pia is starting to find it annoying that she has to help around the house. She's coming up with various (ineffective) excuses.
It's lunchtime again. Pia's job is to set the table for lunch:
Mommy: Pia, set the table now.
Pia: (playing with her toys) Mahmeeee.....I'm not you messenger boy!
Daddy and Mommy: (giggle)
Pia: That's NOT funny!
* * *
Sammy is crying and looking for attention.
Mommy is busy. Daddy is busy. Dominic is in school. Pia is playing with her toys:
Mommy: Pia, can you help me take care of Sammy?
Pia: No, thanks.
* * *
Dominic acquired the ability to read words that he hasn't seen before. He doesn't know what those words mean of course, but he can pronounce them, if not correctly, then with an educated guess.
It has to do with the way they teach reading at his school. It seems they are taught to remember how various letter combinations sound like, so that when he sees those letter combinations, he knows how to sound them out.
This approach works for reading, but not for writing.
We asked him to write a few sentences and we were aghast to discover that he also writes words by sounding them out. Thus, 'castle' gets written down as 'cassel' or 'cassle'. Even words that he has known for years get written down phonetically: 'becos' (because), 'hause' (house), there (their), clowd (cloud), etc.
We will have to fix this.
* * *
Dusk time. We were walking to the grocery and the moon was following us.
Dominic was staring up at the full moon. This is the same moon that Pia caused to follow her.
Dominic noticed that the moon seemed to be following us:
Dominic: (joking) Daddy, when we go inside the grocery, is the moon going to follow us inside?
* * *
Pia picks up expressions from her TV watching. Sometimes she hears them right, sometimes not quite so right.
One time Pia was in the kitchen. She wants to get out but Daddy was blocking her way:
Pia: Hey Daddy, I want to get out.
Daddy: Oh, sorry, am I blocking your way?
Pia: Yes, get away from my way.
(Get out of my way?)
* * *
Pia is playing with her toys in the bedroom. It's almost time for lunch. It's her job to set the table for lunch:
Mommy: (in the kitchen) Pia, set the table.
Pia: (no response)
Mommy: Pia, come on now. Set the table.
Pia: (no response)
Daddy: (angry tone) Pia! Are you going to set the table?
Pia: (from inside the bedroom) I AM ! ...but I cannot.
... and then she goes on playing.
* * *
In his quest to get his hands on some money, Dominic once considered being a bounty hunter.
His second idea sounds just as promising:
Dominic: Daddy, if my teeth falls out and I put in under my pillow it will become money?
Daddy: (not sure if he will bust the myth and end the child's innocence or tell a lie to prolong the childhood) Who told you that?
Dominic: Nobody. I just know (that's his standard reply)
Daddy: (not committing to either position) Some say if you put your tooth under the bed, the tooth fairy will come in and get your tooth and pay you for it.
Dominic: (touches one of his teeth) Hmm...
* * *
Pia's reading practice at home:
Daddy: (points to the word WE) What's this word?
Pia: Me!
Daddy: Nope
Pia: (thinks it's the accent that's wrong, so tries the Australian accent) Meih?
* * *
Sammy has recently discovered something sticking out between his legs.
Ever since this discovery, he has been performing a status check each time we remove his soiled diapers.
Because he's lying down when we take the diapers off, he cannot do a visual, so he'll move his hand to the area, and check that his thing is still there. This his preflight check.
Then we carry him to the bathroom and wash his behind. Before we put in clean diapers, he does another check. That's his post-flight check.
Dominic plans to one day build a rocket to the sun and Sammy is training to be the pilot. These pre- and post- flight checks are part of his training.
* * *
We were having cucumbers at lunch. The children aren't familiar with this veggie:
Pia: (pointing) What's that?
Daddy: Cucumbers
Pia: Cucubers
Daddy: No, cucumber
Pia: Cumcumber
Daddy: No, Cu-cum-ber
Pia: (starts singing a children's song) Cucumberra sits in the old gum tree....
(Original lyrics: Kookaburra sits in the old gum tree...)
* * *
Dominic: "I am people of the week"
Daddy: (understanding what he meant) How do you know?
Dominic: My classmates told me
Every week, one student from each class is nominated as student of the week and the student receives an award for some meritorious behaviour. It was Dominic's turn, for 'persevering in his writing'.
* * *
We let the children attend a children's group during Mass one Sunday.
The teacher read the story of John the Baptist and then asked some questions. Since most of the children were older than Pia, and the teacher had an Australian accent, we were curious if Pia could keep up.
So after Mass we asked her:
Daddy: Pia, did you like going to that school?
Pia: Yes.
Daddy: Do you want to go back?
Pia: Yes. I like the teacher.
Daddy: Do you understand what the teacher was saying?
Pia: Yes. ... But I don't know what the words mean.
* * *
Dominic is a sigurista.
That's someone who doesn't like to play if he won't win, doesn't like to try something new, and doesn't like to reply if he doesn't know the answer.
Daddy: (wanting to test if Dominic already knows the names of his classmates) Let's see how many classmate's names you know.
Dominic: (quiet)
Daddy: Hello?
Dominic: Do you mean I should tell you the number or tell you the names and you will count?
* * *
Up until about a year ago, Dominic had the habit of sneezing without turning his face away. It was an especially gruesome habit when sneezes while talking to someone.
One second he's talking to you and the next ... ACHOOOPLKT! ... you just had someone sneeze point blank into your face.
Without missing a beat he'll continue to talk as if what he did was as normal as blinking.
Meanwhile, you patiently dry off your face.
* * *
You notice him looking at you with rapt attention. You fall for it.
That little gap between his two front teeth makes him all the more endearing. If there is a face of baby-like innocence, surely Sammy's cannot be far from it.
You make baby talk and you inch your face closer. Perhaps to kiss him. Perhaps to smell him. Perhaps both.
His grin widens and his eyes twinkle with excitement. He adores you as much as you adore him.
It is when your face is less than a foot away that the open-fisted right hook comes. BAM! This 11-month old baby has just slugged you. And it's a pretty firm one too. One that's made eyeglasses fly off.
You are still surprised when the second right hook comes.
His grin is now wider. You've made his day.
* * *
Dominic loves folding paper planes.
We borrow books about paper plane folding and books about origami for him, and he devours them night and day. He must have folded over 50 different kinds of planes, not counting those he made up himself:
Daddy: Hey, maybe when you grow up you want to build airplanes.
Dominic: (intrigued) Oh...wow...that's too difficult. I need to be fourteen years old to do that.
* * *
Dominic and Pia screaming and very noisy while playing inside:
Mommy: (wanting some quiet) Ssssshhhhh!
Pia: (in whispers) Quiet Dominic, there's a wolf.
* * *
Pia's reading is constantly improving. Sometimes slowly, sometimes a little faster. She just passed her in house test conducted by her teacher (Daddy) and assessed by the principal (Mommy). She can read the following words and phrases:
in, come, quiet, queue, girl, you, boy, am, good night, Mummy, Daddy, good morning, how, fine, no, not, yes, Paul, Pia, Dominic, Sammy, can, read, chair, keep, thank, stand, this, what, is car, see, table, flower, tree, book, look, picture, keep, please, auntie, uncle, thank you, close, door, open, goodbye, my, name, we, are, friends, Merry Christmas, sit, down, up, stand, and her current favorite phrase: good grief.
Dominic seems to be a regular customer of the school's first aid clinic.
One day after Pia cut her lower lip by biting the plastic leg of a toy cart, Dominic came home from school with a bloodied lower lip.
He and two classmates were playing and running when he crashed into a table. That's his version of the story.
* * *
Pia cried a suppressed "Ungghh!" and then went over to the sofa and sat down. She was holding a dismantled leg of a toy plastic food cart.
Daddy: What's wrong?
Pia: Nothing
Daddy: (wanting to take a look) Can you come here?
Pia comes over. She has blood on her lower lip and on the wrist of her shirt, apparently from wiping blood from her lip.
Daddy: Why is there blood on your lips? You cut your lip! How did that happen?
Pia: (showing the leg of the toy cart) I bit this.
Daddy: (??) Why did you bite it?
Pia: I don't know.
* * *
Pia was spinning around, making herself dizzy when she took one round too many and suddenly...BLAG! Down she goes on the floor, rolling under the computer table:
Daddy: (concerned) Are you hurt?
Pia: (using Australian accent on the last word) Yes. But not so much. I'm just dei-zei
Sometimes we dread the collection time during Mass.
One the one hand, we want the children to learn about and acquire the habit of giving donations. On the other hand, we worry what the children will do each time.
Last Sunday, as the collector approached, Mommy hurriedly grabbed some coins from her purse and passed it on to Dominic to drop into the collection bag.
The way normal people give their donation is by slightly lowering their closed hand into the bag and letting go of the donation.
But normal seems to be not for us.
Dominic approached the man with the bag, then lifted his hand five inches from the top of the bag, then started letting go of the coins one by one, pausing in between each coin: plink. plink. plink. plink. plink.
* * *
The magic only works if you really believe.
If Sammy doesn't want to eat and he doesn't want to open his mouth to accept food, how can you make him open his mouth?
Ask Pia to say 'Open Sesame'. Like magic, Sammy will obediently open his mouth.
It doesn't work if Daddy says it. It sometimes works if Mommy says it. But Pia has a 100% batting average.
She doesn't even have to shout the words out. Even if she's across the room and barely audible, just uttering those magic words is enough to make Sammy contentedly open his mouth and accept the spoon.
* * *
Pia hasn't learned to tell time yet. All she knows about hours is that at 3 o' clock, school is out and it's time to pick up her brother.
It's also time for her to persuade us to bring her along to school for the pickup. Being too young for school, she spends her days inside the house. Understandably, she is excited every time there's a chance to get out.
So when we decided to spend the afternoon at the nearby playground, she readied herself very quickly, putting on her outdoor clothes and jacket.
After getting dressed, she noticed that, not only was the rest of the family not yet ready, they did not even seem to be in a hurry.
So she pointed to the wall clock and called out: "Mommy! Hurry up, it's already ten dollars!"
* * *
Taken a few years ago in front of City Hall, in Hong Kong. In front of the City Hall is the harbour and the original Star Ferry pier (which they tore down and moved to another location just after we left).
Although there are days when Sammy doesn't want to open his mouth to eat, there are other days when he really wants to eat.
When that happens, you have to keep up with him. You cannot feed him while doing something else. You have to keep putting food in his mouth, while he keeps on chewing and swallowing as fast as he can.
If you get distracted and fail to put food in his mouth the moment he opens it, he'll bang his hands on his high-chair. Or he'll tug at your sleeve. Or he'll make noises: MMM! MMM! MMM!
But if you keep up with his pace, he'll eat happily, swinging both his legs and flapping his hands while eating.
* * *
The swat is the most irritating technique that Sammy has come up with to block our attempts to feed him when when he doesn't feel like eating.
He has another technique, which is far less irritating and far less messy -- his faked convulsions.
He performs this fake convulsion by shaking his head left to right as vigorously as he physically can, to the point we sometimes wonder if his head will fall off. And while shaking his head, he has his eyes rolled up, so that almost only the whites are visible.
* * *
Late one afternoon the moon was already up. Pia was playing outside while waiting for the rest of the family to come out for a walk.
Pia noticed that the moon seemed to be following her. She stared up at it, took three steps to the left, and saw that it 'moved' in the same direction. She took three steps to the right, and the moon again 'followed'.
Pia: Look Daddy, the moon is following me where I go!
Daddy: Why is that, do you think?
Pia: Because I'm powerful.
* * *
If Mommy or Daddy don't get the message that Sammy doesn't want to eat, and if they still persist in trying to deliver a spoonful of food to his mouth, then the little emperor ups the notch by pulling another trick from his sleeve: the swat.
Once the spoon is in range...SWAT! He flicks his hand and hits your hand, sending food flying from the spoon down to the floor. Tempers flare.
Sometimes it's a bulls-eye on the spoon and the spoon itself flies out of your hand and onto the floor. Oh, the blood pressure.
A carpeted floor is the worst kind of floor to have when spilling wet and soupy baby food. And yes, that's the kind of floor we have.
This swat trick has trained Mommy and Daddy to develop their individual techniques in holding the spoon firmly, to tense their wrist and hand muscles when feeding Sammy, and to be alert at the first sign of a coming swat.
* * *
Not for the faint of heart is the job of feeding a baby.
Sammy's appetite varies from feeding to feeding. Some foods, like sweets, are always welcome. But he cannot be fed on sweets alone, so real food must find a way in.
And the way in can be hard and narrow when he decides he doesn't want to eat.
As soon as he senses the next spoonful of food coming toward him, he'll shake his head left and right -- a firm 'No'.
Usually he won't even give the courtesy of looking at you when he shakes his head. He will look away, or past you, or up at the ceiling. "Begone slave, I am full", seems to be the proper English translation.
If you don't heed the No, and you still move the spoon closer, he'll turn his face away, to the left. Go to his left, and he'll turn to the right. Go to his right, and he'll turn back to the left. Left. Right. Left. Right. All this time his mouth is locked tight and you have no chance of inserting the food at all.
"Come on, Sammy, open your mouth" is the hopeless refrain you sing during this dance.
The little king gets agitated and shakes his head even more wildly: Off with you! Do you not know what No means?
* * *
Quite apart from the threat of global warming, the cold weather also brings with it the threat of bed-wetting.
One morning we woke up with two surprises. First was that Pia was sleeping in our bed instead of in hers, and second, that she was wearing pajama bottoms different from what she slept in.
We suspected that she wet her bed again, but when we checked her bed, it wasn't wet.
So we investigated further:
Daddy: Pia, did you weewee again?
Pia: (defensive) No.
Daddy: Why did you change your pants?
Pia: Because it was wet, but my bed is not wet.
Daddy: Your pants are wet but you did not weewee?
Pia: Only my pants are wet.
Daddy: Only your pants are wet?
Pia: Yes.
Daddy: Did you weewee in your bed?
Pia: No
Daddy: So how come your pants are wet?
Pia: (alibi) I wet my pants with my saliva.
* * *
Pia is still too young to be in school, so she spends her days at home playing, studying, and watching kids' TV.
From watching Australians on TV, she picks up phrases and pronunciations here and there. For instance, she often pronunces me as 'may', instead of the American style 'mee':
Mommy: Pia, come here!
Pia: "Are you calling may, Mommy?"
But sometimes she mishears things, something understandable if you know how the Aussies speak (somtheyng ohndersteyndabl eif you noy how Oyzzeis spake)
These past few days she's been going around saying "what's going out of here?", or "Daddy, what's going out of here?", or "Hey, what's going out of here?", which we think is her mishearing of "what's going on here?"
* * *
Some children's games become classic, enjoyed by millions and millions of children from generation to generation.
Some children's games do not:
Pia: Domu, let's play a game.
Dominic: Ok.
Pia: I will say different words and you tell me which one is right.
Dominic: Ok.
Pia: Which word is right: Popeye, paypay, popoy, peepee
Dominic: (no hesitation) Popeye.
Pia: Oh.
* * *
In the Peanuts comic strip, there's a character named Linus. He's the little boy who's always carrying around his security blanket and who's always sucking his thumb.
Our Sammy's preferred security blanket are socks. Used and dirty socks. We often catch him with the toe of his sock caught in his bite, and the rest of the sock still attached to his foot, which is hanging between the ground and his face.
Hand him a sock and it goes directly to his mouth.
During the Sign of Peace part of Mass, people greet each other and reach out to shake hands.
At this past Sunday's sign of peace, as everyone was turning around and greeting and shaking hands with everyone around them, Dominic, for the first time, tried to shake hands with those around him. But it wasn't as easy as he thought.
No one had noticed him, and he was turning around trying to catch people's eyes and hands, but no one even saw him.
Finally, jokingly, and giggling, he tapped the wrist of the woman standing behind him and offered his open hand. The surprised woman smiled, bent down and shook hands with Dominic.
At bedtime. Dominic is talking about one classmate who's teasing him:
Dominic: (somewhat pensive) My classmate calls me 'biscuit man'.
Mommy: Why?
Dominic: Because I always have biscuit for my snack in school. (Smiling wide) But I don't care.
Pia: (in the bunk below) And I'm a biscuit girl! Because I always eat biscuit!
***
Domu seemed anxious to have money. Probably to buy a chocolate bar. We had explained to him a few days earlier that money is not free, and that people work to get money. Since then, he occasionally seemed distracted. Apparently, he's been working his brain trying to figure out how he can get his hands on some coins.
The first working idea that he revealed to us was not promising:
Dominic: Daddy, if some bad men got some money and the police are chasing them, and we use our car to crash into the bad men's car and the police caught the bad men....can we get the bad men's money?
One of Domu's classmates call him 'biscuit man' because he always has biscuits for snack during Recess. Eager to help him assimilate, we were curious what his classmates were having for their snacks, so we asked him:
Mommy: Dominic, what do your classmates eat during recess?
Dominic: Some of them eat apples. Some of them eat oranges. Some eat grapes.
Mommy: Do any of them eat yogurt?
Dominic: Sometimes
Pia : (butting in) Do any of them eat dirt?
* * *
While watching the movie Daredevil (starring Ben Affleck) where Daredevil jumps from rooftop to rooftop:
Pia: Daddy, how can he jump like that?
Daddy: Like what?
Pia: (pointing to TV) Like that , he can jump from tall buildings.
Daddy: Because he's not afraid.
Pia: I'm also not afraid. I can also jump from a tall building.
Daddy: Don't do that!
Pia: Dahhdeee...! I will not do it while I am still a child. I need to practice first.
"Jane* ruined my plans", said Dominic. The 'plans' refer to playing in one the contraptions in the playground. Apparently some of girls in his class didn't want him playing there since they were playing.
It was funny hearing the phrase 'ruined my plans'. First time Dominic uttered them.
*not her real name
Mommy: Dominic, Pia, are you not yet finished?
Pia: Yes!
Dominic: No!
Mommy: (confused) Finished or not?
Dominic: Mommy, when you ask 'not' you don't know what we mean when we say yes or no.
In other words, Mommy's way of asking questions lead her to confusion about the answer. Does Yes mean yes, we are not yet finished, or does 'No' mean, no we are not yet finished.
At the dinner table. Pia was pretending to be a ghost and goes 'awoohh', 'Awwwoooohhhh', 'AWOOOOOHHHHH'.
Sammy is silently observing. He's never seen this before.
And then he jumps in : 'ahhhhhhhh', 'Ahhhhhhh', 'AAAAHHHHHHHHH!'
Soon the kitchen is filled with awoooooooooooohhhh and ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! from this 10-month old boy.
"I'm going to make a rocket that will go to the sun!", said Dominic.
Daddy: But the sun is very hot. The rocket will melt.
Dominic: This rocket is very strong. It will not melt.
Daddy: (Teasing) What if the sun runs away just before the rocket arrives?
Dominic: (Getting the joke)...or what if the sun is a balloon and it pops when the rocket hits it?....or what if the sun is made of rubber, and the rocket bounces back to earth when it hits the moon?...or what if the sun is really as small as a coin?....or what if the sun opens its mouth and eats the rocket?
Pia: (chiming in) What if the rocket hits the sun's eyes?
Thud went the carpet. In every home with a baby, everyone instinctively knows what that sound means.
Sammy lay flat on his back after falling off the sofa. A second later he started bawling. And then Pia started sobbing.
She had been taking care of Sammy. Sammy sits between her and the sofa's backrest. That way, Pia keeps Sammy away from the edge of the sofa. But when she stood up for a moment to get something from her desk, Sammy fell.
It must have been some fall. He has scratches and a mild bump on his forehead from the fall.
As a growing baby, it's not enough for Sammy to eat paper. He's now moved on to steel.
Eating at the dining table, and testing Dominic's ability to do maths in his head.
Daddy: Dominic, if a box of cornflakes costs $3.00, and you have $10.00, how many boxes of cornflakes can you buy?
Dominic: (after thinking) Three.
Daddy: That's right.
Dominic: (seriously) Daddy, if one box of vegetables cost $10.00 and each vegetable costs 59 cents and you have one million thousand eighty-five twenty two dollars, how much money do you need to buy five hundred thirty three boxes?
It's Pia's job to set the table for lunch every day (Dinner is Dominic's). But today she seems to be not in the mood.
"I'm too tired to set the table," claimed Pia, while running and jumping around in her bedroom.
Daddy: But if you don't set the table, we won't be able to eat food, and if I can't eat food, I have to eat a little child. Who can I eat?
Pia: Eat Domu!
Daddy: I don't want to eat Domu. He smells bad.
Pia: I also smell bad.
Daddy: But you just took a bath. You smell good. So I will eat you.
Pia: I don't smell good!
At that point she turns around, bends over, pulls down her pants: "Smell my recty!" *
(*rectum)
At lunch.
Daddy: Pia, can you get the water from the fridge?
Pia: (poker faced, no response. not even looking up from her plate)
Daddy: Pia, could you get the water?
Pia: (no reaction)
Daddy: Peeeeeeeeee-yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!
Pia: (still poker faced) You must say please.
