A Thorough Checking

Pia has been eagerly waiting the fair, with its rides. One Sunday:

Pia: Daddy, isn’t today the when the rides are?

Daddy:  Hmm… you may be right. Let me double-check.

Sammy: (unsure what Daddy just said) “The butt check?”

* * *

Tough Decision

One day at lunch:

Sammy:  Daddy can you cook some more of your fried rice?  I like your fried rice better that Mummy's fried rice.

Daddy: But Mummy makes the best baked macaroni.

Sammy: Achie which do you like better.  Mummy's fried rice or Daddy'sfried rice.

Pia: I can't decide.  They're both horrible.

***

An Economical Idea

Sammy: Daddy, when somebody dies why can't we just eat them instead of burying them?  That way we can save some money?

Mask

Sammy was playing in the bedroom.  Then he comes out and asks Mummy.

Sammy: Mummy, can we buy some gas masks?

Daddy: Why do you need gas masks?

Sammy: Achie keeps on farting.

 

* * *

Oops!

The family went biking a couple of months ago.  Sammy crashed (mildly) into a post. 

Daddy said: “Oops!”. 

Big mistake.

Sammy: (crying) I almost died and all you say is “Oops!”?

Daddy: It wasn’t a big crash. You just bumped into a post.

Sammy: What if I kill myself and you will just say “Oops!”?   How about if you fall into a hole and die and I say “Oops”.  How would you feel?  How about if you are hungry and you have no food and you die and I say “Oops.”? 

And Sammy went on like that for several hours, giving example upon example. 

What do you want to be?

While having lunch:

Daddy: Sammy, what do you want to be when you grow up?

Sammy: A bad guy.

* * *

I’m Gonna Kill Myself

Sammy’s expression when he’s frustrated is: “I’m gonna kill myself”.  Among other things, he gets frustrated when he loses to Dad in chess (who Sammy cannot accept can beat him in chess). 

When Sammy loses: “I’m so dumb, I can’t beat anybody in chess. I’m gonna kill myself.” 

One day during lunch he got upset because he c, got off his chair and claimed: “I’m gonna kill myself now. I’ll go to the gunshop and kill myself.”

Sammy’s Chess Rating

Sammy likes to play chess and has joined chess.com.  He wins some games and loses some games.  His current rating is about 920.  He finds it intriguing what his opponents will think if they find out they’re playing against a 6 year old.