First day in school

It is Pia's first ever day in school in Australia.  She's had one and a half years of school in Hong Kong, but because of differences in school age and school year schedules, when we moved to Australia she had to wait until she met the criteria here.

To help her prepare for her first day, we made sure she would speak up when asked by the teacher:

Daddy: Are you excited to go to school?

Pia: Yes

Daddy: Remember to speak out loud, ok?

Pia: Yes

Daddy: If the teacher talks to you and asks, 'Little girl, what is your name?'  What will you say?

Pia: My name is Piglet!

* * *

Mood, incarnate

Dominic and Pia playing make believe tales:

Dominic: Look Pia, I am the prince.

Pia: I am the evil temper.

* * * 

My Myopia gets in the way

We borrowed a Superman DVD. An animated series made in the 1940s, but surprisingly very well done, with almost realistic motion. 

Pia is so taken in by Superman and his powers that she watches keenly each display of super ability. 

While chasing a runaway train, beams come out of Superman's eyes, and he can see inside the train:

Pia: Look, Daddy, look!  Can you do that?

 

* * *

Assignments and the USB Headache Detector

Pia tries different ways to avoid doing her 'assignments' (reading, writing, math exercises we ask them to do)

One day, while Dominic and Pia were trying to do their assignments:

Dominic: Daddy, my head is painful.

Daddy: Go to bed and rest (he's been feeling unwell the past day).

Pia: (notices Dominic got off doing his assignment, says hesitantly) Daddy, my head is a little painful too.

Daddy: (suspicious) Are you sure?

Pia: (weak nod)

Daddy: (picks up a USB memory stick).  Do you know what this is?

Pia: No.

Daddy: This is a lie detector.  If you are telling the truth, this will light up. Are you sure you have a headache?

Pia: (weakly) ...yes...

Daddy: ('sticks' the USB into Pia's ear)....Hmmm see it doesn't light up.  Finish your assignment.

Pia: (slinks back to her desk) Hoookaayyyy.....

* * *

The Destroyer

Pia and Dominic usually like playing together. But there are times when Dominic wants to play by himself when Pia wants them to play together.

If that happens and he resists Pia's initial invitations to play together, she will find ways to force them to 'play' together.  She might pick up one of the toys he's using and run away with it, or she might knock over something he's building, or she might sing and talk so loudly around Dominic that he can't think.  In other words, she will try to drive him mad.

One day, after chasing Pia out of their room:

Dominic: Pia! Don't come in here! If you come back, I will destroy you!

Daddy: Dominic...don't destroy Pia.

* * *

PLBRRPT!

Every now and then, Sammy will stick out a bit of his tongue between his lips, and then blow out air bringing with it saliva: PLBRRPT! spraying wet anything within a foot of his face.

He blows with full force.  If he does it standing up, he gets propelled and has to take a step backward to keep his balance. 

The occurrence is often random, but we've noticed that he seems to especially like doing it during bonding moments.  When everyone is collapsing from a funny joke, for example, he contributes to the moment with a PLBRRPT!  

When you are carrying him and gazing lovingly at his eyes, out of nowhere comes PLBRRPT! straight into your face.

 

* * *

He knows if you've been naughty

Curious about a hypothetical scenario, but wants to ensure she plays no part in it whatsoever, Pia phrases her question neatly:

Pia: What will happen to Dominic if God is angry with him?

Daddy: (avoids direct answer) God doesn't want bad people in heaven.

Pia: Does he know if we're bad?

Daddy: Yes

Pia: Does he know if we're good?

Daddy: Yes

Pia: Does he know if we're just pretending?

* * *

The frog president

Dominic was reading about kings of Israel and then looks up from the book...

Dominic: Daddy, is there a king in Australia?

Daddy: No, but we have a queen.

Dominic: Do other countries have kings?

Daddy: Yes, but only a few.  Most countries don't have kings or queens.

Dominic: Why?

Daddy: People don't like kings anymore.  They like to be able to choose their leader. After a few years, if they don't like their leader, they can change him.

Pia: Change him into what?

* * *

Can we play with God?

Pia comes out from the bedroom, apparently recalling something:

Pia: Daddy, why does God not want us to play with him?

Daddy: Who told you that?

Pia: You did!

Daddy: Me? What did I say?

Pia: When we were playing we said: "Once upon a time, God is dead, the end" you said we shouldn't say that.

 

* * *

Flat Iron Vindaloo

While Daddy was ironing shirts in the living room, Pia started playing and running around near the ironing board:

Daddy: Watch out Pia.  This iron is hot. Stay away.

Pia: Will I get burned if I touch it?

Daddy: Yes.

Pia: Is it very hot?

Daddy: Very hot.

Pia: Is it spicy hot?

* * *

Food for growth

The children enjoyed the family trip to Luna Park, but height restrictions prevented them from taking on some of the attractions they wanted to ride. You had to be taller than 110cm to ride the ferris wheel, or the bump car, or a couple of other rides suitable for kids.

So we told the Dominic and Pia that we'll just visit again next year, when they had grown taller and when they'd be able to enjoy all the rides. 

One day:

Pia: Daddy, I want to go to Luna Park again.

Daddy: Yes, we will go again next year. Hopefully you'll be tall enough to ride the bump car.

Pia: Daddy, what food can I eat to make me grow taller?

Carpe diem.

Daddy: (nonchalantly) Well, you have to eat more rice, drink more milk, eat more veggies.

Pia: (runs to the kitchen) Mommy! Can you give me my milk now?

* * *

Self service in this establishment

Dominic and Pia were slumped in the sofa and watching TV, looking like two up and coming couch potatoes.  Mommy had blended some homemade smoothies (strawberry milkshake). She comes out from the kitchen,  hands each of the kids a glass of the smoothie, and then lies down to rest.

After the kids had finished drinking, and while remaining slumped in the sofa:

Dominic: Mommy!

Pia: Mommy!

Daddy: Why are you calling Mommy?

Pia: (raises the empty glass without taking eyes away from the TV) I'm finished.

They want Mommy to come, retrieve the glasses, and place them in the sink for them. 

Daddy: (angry) It's not Mommy's job to put these glasses in the sink for you!  Do it yourself!

Pia: (still eyes on the TV) But she gave these glasses to us!

* * *

The Day Superman Cried

Sammy wore his olive green hooded jumper for the first time.  To Pia, Sammy in an olive green hood looks like Superman.  She starts calling him Superman.

Mommy went to the bathroom.  Sammy cries whenever Mommy goes to the bathroom, and this time it's no different.  He starts wailing.

Pia: Mommy! Hurry up! Superman is crying!

* * *

Math genius baby

Dominic is practicing the 2 x multiplication table Chinese style (i.e., pronouncing '2 2 4', '2 3 6', '2 4 8', '2 5 10', etc., instead of the cumbersome Western style of '2 times 2 equals 4', '2 times 3 equals 6', etc.)

Sammy picks up the recurring 2's and shouts 'two!'. We pick up the theme:

Daddy: Sammy, what is 1 + 1?

Sammy: Two!

Daddy: 4 / 2?

Sammy: Two!

Daddy: What is the square root of 4?

Sammy: Two!

Daddy: 60,000 / 30,000?

Sammy: Two!

Daddy: Decimal equivalent of binary 10?

Sammy: Two!

 

* * *

The Uncertain Flight Attendant

Pia playing stewardess again.  This time perhaps on her first day at work:

Pia: Ladies and gentlemen, do you need to buckle your seatbelts?

* * *

It's a figure of speech, silly

Daddy is at the office.  He calls home:

Pia: Hello.

Daddy: Hello, who is this?

Pia: This is Pia.

Daddy: Where's Mommy?

Pia: She's at home.

 

...5 seconds of quiet...

 

Daddy realizes Pia was still at the other end waiting for the next question:

Daddy: Can I talk to her?

Pia: Ok. I will call her now.

* * *

Lara Croft, Take 1

The head of Anubis the jackal-god towers over the entrance to an ancient Egyptian temple. Anyone who dares enter the temple soon discovers that inside, it is a maze in pitch black darkness, haunted by roaming monsters that glow in the dark and rabidly chase those whom they see.

This is the Lara Croft attraction at Luna Park, where cheery visitors go in group by group, find their way through the darkness, and run out screaming.

As Mommy and Dominic and Pia waited their turn to go in, we wondered if kids can handle it, so we coached them:

Mommy: Listen, it will be dark inside.  When you walk in some people dressed as monsters will try to scare you. Don't be frightened.  They are just pretending and they will not touch you or hurt you.

Pia: They are not real monsters?

Mommy: No they're not. They're just people who work here.  It's all just for fun. Are you scared?

Dominic, Pia: No.

Mommy: Good. Don't be scared.

Dominic: We're not scared.

So in they went.

And out they popped, five seconds later.  Pia was too scared and they made their exit through the nearest emergency side exit.

 

* * *

Stewardess

Very hot weather.  Pia is standing two inches in front of the electric fan and talking straight into it, enjoying her buzzing voice.  Today she is a flight attendant doing some in-flight contortion announcements:

Pia: Ladies and gentlemen, you need to buckle to your seatbelts. 

* * *

Fraulein from Hamburg?

Dominic and Pia are having mince beef omelet on hamburger rolls.  To them it looks like hamburgers:

Pia: Can I put ketchup on my hambugirl?

 

* * *